Vor einigen Tagen erreichte mich die Frage, wie wir eigentlich zu diesem ganzen Umdenken gekommen sind und ob es große Veränderungen für uns bedeutete, als wir Schritt für Schritt diesen Weg anfingen.
Mein Mann und ich, wir kommen beide aus sehr unterschiedlichen „das machen wir selber“ – Haushalten, in denen etwas Fantasie, Improvisation und handwerkliches Geschick einen großen Stellwert hatten. Wir haben früh gelernt, unseren eigenen Kopf zu haben und uns nicht von irgendwelchen gesellschaftlichen Normen etwas diktieren zu lassen.
So waren wir wohl beide etwas abseits der Norm. Bevor wir uns kennen lernten, hüpfte ich jeden Sommer musizierend von einem Mittelaltermarkt zum anderen und mein Mann verdiente sich neben der Schule sein Geld als Statist an der Oper. Es war sicher von Vorteil, dass wir uns in dieser „Sturm und Drang“ Zeit zwischen Abitur und Studium kennen lernten und nun schon seit zehn Jahren einen gemeinsamen Weg beschreiten, der erfreulicherweise nie langweilig war und es wohl auch nicht mehr werden wird. So konnten wir gemeinsam viel entdecken, hinterfragen, für uns aufbauen.
Seit wir beide keine Studenten mehr sind, sondern Eltern mitten im Berufsleben, hat sich natürlich die ein oder andere Priorität und Möglichkeit geändert. Wir wohnen auch nicht mehr in einer Einraumwohnung, fahren nicht mehr Wartburg oder haben statt Kacheln Sand und Trittsteine im Bad, weil unsere mongolischen Wüstenrennmäuse das damals so lustig fanden (aber schön war’s!).
Das klingt jetzt alles sehr positiv, doch auch negative Erfahrungen haben uns umdenken lassen. Private Hürden wie finanzielle Nöte, zwischenmenschliche Schwierigkeiten, Arbeitssuche, der Verlust zweier uns sehr nah stehenden Menschen innerhalb von wenigen Tagen und nicht zuletzt die sich wandelnden politischen und gesellschaftlichen Strukturen um uns herum haben uns an unsere Grenzen gebracht (und diese sicher in die ein oder andere Richtung verschoben).
Bewusster leben, Geld sparen, vernünftig konsumieren, gesund sein, zukunftsorientiert handeln und viele Kompromisse haben uns auf diesen Weg gebracht. Bereut haben wir in den letzten drei Jahren der Umstrukturierung nichts und es ist sehr bereichernd, die Dinge konstruktiv und konsequent durchzuziehen. Wir bleiben also dabei. Ich bin gespannt, was wir noch so auf die Beine stellen.
Bei dieser Frage muss ich immer etwas schmunzeln. Sie wurde uns schon häufig gestellt, dabei keimte dieser ganze Umbruch auf einem wirtschaftlich gesehen so mageren Boden, dass uns kaum was anderes übrig blieb. Auf gewisse Dinge verzichten, umdenken, hinterfragen, umrüsten: das kostet vor allem Zeit und Zuversicht. Manches hat sich auch gar nicht verändert. Vielleicht kommen wir in diesem Blog manchmal etwas „radikal“ rüber, aber im Grunde genommen sind wir eine ganz normale Familie, die sich ihren Weg sucht (und dabei nicht immer so konsequent ist, wie sie gern wäre).
Trotzdem: durch unsere Umstrukturierung haben wir ein großes Plus an Lebensqualität gewonnen, was vielleicht als kostspielig wahrgenommen wird. Viele Bio-Lebensmittel, wenn längst nicht alle; Haus mit großem Garten; teils teure Neuanschaffungen. Im Endeffekt sparen wir aber viel Geld, weil wir viel Gebrauchtes nutzen. Sperrmüll oder selber bauen statt Ikea, Second-Hand-Laden oder selber nähen statt H&M, selber kochen statt essen gehen (was wir zwar machen, aber sehr selten). Neu kaufen tun wir die Dinge, die wir gebraucht nicht finden, die eine gewisse Qualität haben und die wir auch reparieren können, sollte mal etwas damit sein. So sparen wir im Endeffekt auch wieder einiges.
Wenn wir plötzlich zu Geld kämen, würden wir vermutlich lieben Menschen finanziell unter die Arme greifen, unser Mietshaus kaufen, konkret über Adoption oder Pflegekinder nachdenken, die Jugendstilstühle neu bepolstern lassen, reisen, eine Sauna in den Garten setzen, einen Imkerkurs machen und Bienen anschaffen, den Dachboden ausbauen, ein anderes Auto besorgen und einen Hund in die Familie integrieren.
Aber ganz ehrlich – bis hierhin haben wir es auch ohne großes Geld geschafft. Da bin ich stolz drauf und habe langsam das Gefühl: wenn es uns wichtig ist, schaffen wir den „Rest“ auch noch locker.
Lange, lange habe ich mit der Beantwortung dieser Frage gerungen, die mir vor längerer Zeit schon gestellt wurde (und die ich laut diesem Post schon lange beantworten wollte). Was unterscheidet uns also? Weiß ich nicht so genau. Ist nicht jede Familie anders als jede andere? Vielleicht haben wir uns ein paar andere Prioritäten gesetzt als der Durchschnitt, aber das erkennt man nicht unbedingt auf den ersten Blick. Auf den zweiten sieht man vielleicht eher, was fehlt. Wir konsumieren sehr bewusst, was sich in vielen Bereichen wiederspiegelt.
Wir kaufen weder Obst und Gemüse mit Aufklebern, noch essen wir öfter als zwei mal im Monat Fleisch; unsere Milchflaschen sind ohne Etikett oder Marke, da wir sie auf einem kleinen Demeterhof befüllen; die Kleidung ist vorzugsweise aus Naturmaterialien und aus zweiter Hand; statt einem Wasserkocher benutzen wir einen Kessel; im Garten toben lustige Hühner; wir haben keinen Fernseher, dafür mehrere Plattenspieler; in Haus und Gartenhäuschen verteilt sind viele verschiedene Werkstätten, die ich beruflich brauche und mein Mann genauso gerne nutzt, von Stoff über Holz bis hin zu Ton und Malerei; wir haben keinen normalen Zucker; die Töpfer unseres Essgeschirrs kennen wir mit Vornamen; überall findet man Musikinstrumente und geschnitzte Holzfiguren; alte Möbel aus verschiedenen Epochen – vom Barocktisch aus der Erbschaft bis hin zum Sofa aus den 50er Jahren – werden heiß geliebt und gern genutzt; die Zahnbürsten sind aus Holz; Plastik ist überhaupt kaum zu finden und wir haben kein Shampoo im Haus.
So hat wohl jeder seine Vorlieben, Wertvorstellungen und sonstige Prägungen, die den Alltag mit bestimmen.
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